I can’t sleep. 

I can’t, cause i never stop thinking about it.

Okay, someone asked me for a date. He’s just a friend of mine. And he already met my mom(even just for a minute and half ๐Ÿ˜‚). 

But now, he asked me..again. I don’t know. I’m new to this, even though I am 20 yrs old, but I’m still new at “dating”. 

Yeah, it’s mean nothing, and we are a friend, but….. 

then I asked my mom, bolehka? then she said, boleh if mama ikut.. *laughing* okayyy.. i think that’s a good sign from my mom. Anddddd i was brave + stupid enough to asked my brother anddd he’s reaction was not good, by i mean not good, it was bad. He keep silent for a-i-dont-think-the-clock-is-ticking and no answer.

Then i waited for a couple of conversations (about other things) then i asked him again, he diam and thinking for a moment *now i know silence can’t kill* then he said, “I’ve been out with many girls before, the first date thing, and imagining you becoming like those girls, talking random things, walking with the guy, I don’t think you are ready. If you are far away from us, i will be fine with it but as long as you’re here under my guardian, I don’t think i will allow you to do that”. 

Ohhh mannn. No means no. Right? Then he said, whoever the guys is, he should came up ready with few deadly questions from him. 

but….it just a date of a friend…but..still no.. 

#onefineday #notready 

sharing the happiness: Shulamite cafe

if you’re looking for a nice cafe house, place for you to hangout peacefully, I recommend this cafe house called Shulamite, MetroTown, Kota Kinabalu, Sabah๐Ÿคฃ.

it is a very cute cafe house with nice owners, nice beverages and nice cakes ๐ŸŽ‚. If you want something simple, nice place for a date, go for Shulamite. It’s fun + cute.! 

cause i was visiting this cafe house on Chinese New Year, i have this brownies for free. And my brother called it hipster starter pack๐Ÿ˜‚. 

p/s : i kno that i’m bad at writing reviews but if i posted it on my wordpress that’s mean something. Okay. #takenote 

oh my shoulder.ย 

i dont know why nor how i hurt my left shoulder. I thought it was simple (musle injury / bad sleeping position) but it lasted for days till today.

I love to laugh, and now i can’t even laugh, it’s hurt. I dont know why. I can’t sit or laying on my left side..I can’t laugh too much.. ๐Ÿ˜ญ

I tried googling about it, but, I can’t find my answers.. and I don’t go to the doctors cause it’s just a minor injury. Enough with my operation, medicines four years ago…i dislike hospital. So i’m trying my best to avoid the hospital๐Ÿ˜ฌ.

I didn’t put any minyak panas or anything like that, I don’t know if urut will be helpful (I don’t know how) .. so i just stick with this ice pack on my shoulder for few minutes before bedtime.

Living in a fairytale?

if you ask me, yea, my mom raised me with fairytale story, happy ending, romance novel and she teach me so many things about love.

in my 19 years of life, my definition of TRUE LOVE is when someone or to be precise an opposite gender someone that we don’t know accept all of my flaws, willing to spend his(in my case, a male) life with me, someone perfect, someone that so handsome until I can call him my own prince charming, someone that I fall in love in first sight and someone that can guide me to the right path until we can go to Jannah together and because of this i prayed to Allah to give me a better version of a person inside my life because I want to be better…

but actually I was wrong.

since the beginning, I’m living with the true-love-of-my-life. she is my MOM. my mother. she fall in love with me since I was a little blip inside her womb. she’s willing to do everything for me, the morning sickness, the craving of river fish that she never loved, she tried to fulfil all of it, she tried.

right now, my dream of hearing “future” lullaby is no longer exist. actually, i have it already, i just have to see it from the other side, my mom snore is my lullaby. it is more than snore, it is everything.

once, i want to be a better person for that “future” but now i know i want to be better because of my mom. she is the most better person for an example that i can’t ask for more. she’s perfect in everything. she is a strong woman.

once, i want to be married when i’m 23 years old, but now, i know it is too soon. i want to take care of my mom. i can never repay everything that she’s have done to me, but i’m willing to spend the rest of my life with her, forever. let’s achieve the Jannah together mom.

once, I want to live on my own so that I can never heard she’s scolding me about my wrongdoings, but now, I want to learn and I want to heard every single detail about it. she raise me to be a good daughter,a good person, not a rebel.

now i see it, i am living in my own fairytale. so perfect. i have a person that love me beside me. its okay to be hate by many, as long as to be loved by one.



Dinner … ๐Ÿ

Whenever I cook for my mom i feel so nervous.. cause i think there is no way i can beat her cooks. Everyone knows how good cooker our mom is. And if my mom request something I just wanted to prepare her the best and delicious food ever.

Spaghetti we go. I can only capture the early stage of my cook, cause i was so focused on my cooking after that.. lol.

The perfect shaped of capsicum. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜˜

Tadaaa.! Luckily my mom loves it. It is priceless when my mom loves it and the looks on her face. Best sight ever.

More to cook for Mom! ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿป

Now i can enter the Master Chef competition ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ #imtoofarfromthat #jokingjaa

Movie : Tenggelamnya Kapal Van Der Wijck.

most of my friends asked me to watch this movie, and I never heard any bad reviews about it, but i don’t bother about this movie till today.

This movie leave a huge hole inside my heart. Totally worth the watch. Totally worth my time.

Too many life’s value inside it and yeah, i sound cliche but my advice, prepare some tissues or a box of tissues.,

true love doesn’t means that you have to be together, as long as the love lives truly inside your heart, you will never feel the emptiness or sadness, true love keeps you moving, no matter how many times you fall, get up and fight for a better life. It is what love does, it gives you hope, it gives you happiness, it shows you the way of life but it also give you saddness and sorrows, if you strong with it, the light will guide you to find other happiness in loving. Love doesn’t kill…the choice is ours, whether to rise or fall with it..ย